“I’m not getting any younger”
is, of course, a positively idiotic statement
beating the obvious to death
with a blunt verbal instrument.
But it still beats saying
that death impends ever closer
for that is simply turgid
and odious all at the same time.
What I’m here to say
is that by being cremated
I’m saving you all manner
of expense, no gravesite, no stone,
no maintenance fees, and you
can keep me on the mantle,
spread me on the ocean
or nice lake, or dump me
under that tree out back
beyond the ever-growing compost heap.
Do with me what you will,
we will sort out my feelings
in our next life, karma willing.