Dear politician:
I received what seemed
like a stream of emails from you
this week and I would like you
to stop sending them, but of course
your unsubscribe link doesn’t work.
I trust you got it from the same people
that fail to wire the Close Door buttons
on nearly every elevator I have ridden.
Please know you are wasting
your time seeking money from me,
because (1) you are of that other party,
the one I deeply despise and whose
candidates will never receive my vote
as a matter of morality and principles , or
(2) you are of my party of registration
but keep asking for money predicting
the end of the world as I know it
if you don’t win, and you don’t even
do it as well as those crazy ministers
who always give me a good laugh,
or (3) you and your positions are
certifiably nuts (although you might
also fall within reason (1) or (2) above).
And by the way, you might get somewhere
if you tell me what you stand for,
and not merely who you stand against.