• NEATLY PRESSED

    I have decided to stopwearing the only suit I now own.It is the one I only wear to weddingsor to funerals, or a bar mitzvah.the problem is that it needsto be a happy, if only slightly,suit and lately it seemsdeaths outnumber weddingsand Bar or Bat Mitzvahsonly count as neutral nowthat I no longer practice Judaism.I…


  • WHITE BREAD

    He was nondescript, innocuous. He named his dog Dog. His cat was called Cat. He grew daring with his parakeet and named it Wings. He wore beige from head to toe. Even his Sunday best, his “weddings and funerals suit” he called it, was beige. People wondered if his underwear was beige. He swore that…


  • THE TIE’S LAMENT

    I still have the tieI wore to m grandmother’sfuneral, one I conducted,but the suit from that dayis long gone, and just as well,for it would be several sizestoo large for the present me. I’ve only worn the tie oncesince that rainy day in Marylandand then to a weddingto balance out the sadnesswith a bit of…